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A Resolution Worth Making (And Keeping)

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 20:51:18 GMT

Have you broken that new year's resolution yet?

Studies show that most people who make new year's resolutions have broken them by the end of January. Me? I generally resist making them in the first place, though I do resolve to be a better person during other times of the year.

I think the whole problem with new year's resolutions is that they feel forced and they're generally self-centered. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a better person, but perhaps we approach becoming a better person from the wrong perspective.

This is my observation: Want to make yourself a better person? Then help someone else to become a better person. You may even find your life's calling along the way.

Through the water ministry project I mentioned in December's blog, I've learned that for many communities, having clean water changes everything. I've found my life's calling working with clean water ministry, and I've resolved to do something about it this year.

But what about you? Have you found a ministry outside the four walls of your church that you believe is your life's calling? If not, I encourage you to begin searching.

So... where do you start?

My advice is to go on mission trips, volunteer in your community, hang out with others who are making a difference in the world, and pray for God's wisdom and discernment as you go. In The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren recommends discovering your gifts and callings through trial and error. Sure, there are many spiritual gift tests around in books and on the internet; but to find your true passions in life, you just have to discover them on your own sometimes. I discovered that I love teaching older children quite back accident. I first volunteered to teach simply because I was tired of being called to sub in another class with only 5-30 minutes notice. Now, I look forward to it.

I've also come to realize that one of the best ways to grow in a relationship with God is to go on a mission trip. It can be in your state, in your country, or halfway around the world -- but something that causes you to depend on God and focus on others can be life-changing. Want your church to become less self-centered and more other-centered? Plan a trip and take them with you!

I know some people will say that their mission field is right in their own backyard. And yes, I wholeheartedly agree. But I also believe that we are still called to go and tell. In Matthew 28:19, where Jesus commands us to "go and make disciples of all nations," the word "go" literally means "as you go." (Hey, it's cool being married to a pastor, some of this stuff rubs off occasionally.) So anyway... going is expected, so let's expect to go.

What about your young children? Take them with you! Let them see first hand what being the church really looks like, and give them a head start on becoming the person whom God made as well.

posted by "Moose"

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Ideas For a Simple, Meaningful Christmas Season

Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:08:21 GMT

Christmas may be the "most wonderful time of the year", but it can also turn in to the most stressful time of the year as well. As children, we delighted in the gift-giving and receiving, the special activities, the lights, the cookies, the stories, and all the things that came together to make the Christmas season special. And then we grew up...

Suddenly each of those activities required planning and preparation. Then they multiplied into many more obligations needing crammed in to an already hectic schedule. For many adults, Christmas becomes a season to survive rather than a season to celebrate. Somewhere along the way, many of us feel like somehow we're missing the whole point.

But it doesn't have to be that way.

First, Keeping it Simple:
If ever there were a time to simplify our lives, I believe the Christmas season needs it the most. I would love to hear the thoughts of others, and I will in turn share some of mine:

- Our yearly Christmas program is a simple rather than elaborate production during a regular evening worship time of our church. We perform it to glorify God, not ourselves. We also schedule it on a Sunday when we'd usually have a fellowship meal, so that we're not adding an extra event to the normal calendar.

- We don't have a separate program for children, youth, adults, or other special choirs. We do one program and each group has a small part in it, so that we're not adding additional stress to the season. The children generally practice their small part at the end of the Sunday school hour and/or for a few minutes immediately after our regular mid-week children's program.

- We do have other celebratory events, but they're also kept simple and scheduled during our regular meeting times.

- As a family, we carefully evaluate the events and activities we attend or participate in. We don't become hermits, but we do purposefully slow our social calendar down and spend more time together instead.

- We focus on our relationship with God. We let Him center us as only He can. I will often begin a new study or devotional that helps me to know Him more.

Then, Making it Meaningful:
When we simplify the season, we also make room for a more meaningful event in our lives and in the lives of those around us. We can volunteer in local organizations that make a difference in our community, and give the gift of our time and talents to others. And most of all, we make room in our lives for true worship and communion with the One who rescued us from a path of self-destruction and replaced it with an abundant life.

Several years ago, inspired by some of my fellow online pastors' wives, I put an end to the endless shopping to find gifts for those who already have everything they could possibly want or need, and started donating to charities in their honor instead. I did this for family, church workers, and even school teachers (how many apple-themed knick knacks or gallons of shower gel do they really need?) I matched their interests with gift ideas from the World Vision Gift Catalog, or I donated to a charity they already work with, such as the Gideons and denominational disaster relief organizations. This year, thanks to other pastors' wives from around the world, I've also become aware of Tearfund, Heifer International, and The Leprosy Mission. Do you have a favorite charity or denominational ministry you like to give to? Please leave us a comment and tell us about it.

We can also be creative in how we give to others. Fair trade organizations like World Crafts and Trade As One offer opportunites to buy gifts that help families in developing nations earn a living wage and break the cycle of poverty. This trading relationship also gives missions personnel an inroad for sharing the gospel. Again, if you know of a similar organization, please make us aware of it in the comments section.

Looking for something more? Then perhaps you're up to the Advent Conspiracy challenge (versions of this video customized for Canada, Australia, and the U.K. are also available in the "resources section" of the advent conspiracy website):

I took the challenge this year and organized a charitable giving fundraiser for the Pure Water, Pure Love ministry. In exchange for a name-your-own-price donation, participants will receive a specially-labeled water bottle, an ornament made by our children's Sunday school classes, a gift card, and a gift bag to give to the person they're honoring with the donation. This is a project God called me to do this year, as I learned through tears how many parents in third world countries do not even name their children until they're at least two years of age, because it's unlikely they will live that long. It has truly been a partnership between us, and I look forward to what we'll do together next.

I would encourage everyone who reads this article to be open and sensitive to a worthy cause God may be laying on your heart this Christmas season. And please... tell us about it in the comment section so that we can all share in the joy!

May God bless you with a worshipful and meaningful Christmas.

Love, "Moose"

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Now That You've Voted...

Tue, 04 Nov 2008 17:27:49 GMT

Note: Although women from around the world are a part of pastorswives.org, the U.S. election has received more international attention this year than in year's past. I encourage pastors' wives from around the world to take the main point of this blog entry and apply it to their own unique situations.

If you're like me, you're probably relieved this election will be over with today. Tensions are high these days; and political leanings have, at times, strained relationships. So now that it's over (or almost over anyway); what now?

For some politicians, they'll probably already be planning their strategy for next election. But what about us? Certainly, we'll be praying for whomever is elected. While that is extremely important, we don't have to stop there.

Many Christians have causes that are near and dear to their hearts. For some, it's preventing more abortions. For others, it's caring for the poor. And for still others, it's a combination "pro-life ethic" that has been gaining popularity in recent years. I have also seen Christians embrace issues such as caring for God's creation, and opposing ideas that trap others in self-destructive lifestyles. Whatever your passion, I encourage you to look to God for help, and resist the urge to rely on fallible politicians.

Now that you've voted, I'd like to issue a challenge: ponder and pray about what else you can do to help the cause that is so dear to your heart. Are you pro-life? Please consider donating to and volunteering at a pregnancy center, as well as adopting a child whose life might otherwise be in jeapordy. Concerned about the poor? Give your time, money, and talents to help those who need it. Concerned about creation? Lead by example and get your church involved in creation stewardship as well. Concerned about moral values? Be the church everywhere you go. Get involved in your community and in the lives of those around you. Shine the light of Christ wherever you go. Help people transform their lives. And above all, pray! God cares for His people more than you do.

Maybe you already donate and/or volunteer -- wonderful! I encourage you to do more and to recruit others. Maybe you're already involved -- fantastic! But never rest on your coattails -- always be in communication with God and ask Him to reveal more opportunities for you and your church.

What if all the money that has been spent on political campaigns through the years -- both successful ones and unsuccessful ones, were instead used to fund the very causes the various candidates are pledging to support? What if all the hours spent campaigning and/or lobbying for favorite candidates were spent volunteering for these causes instead? How many of these problems would be solved by now? How many other problems would at least be much less of a problem?

Some friends of ours began The Mercy Foundation several years ago. They had a vision of creating a "city of refuge", and have already begun reaching out to and providing for the needs of single moms, as well as providing work education and literacy training to those getting out of prison (to name a few things). They are also working towards getting a free medical clinic going and perhaps even a free hospital. Overseas, they are in the process of building an orphanage in Kenya.

If Christians really banded together, we could change the world with God's help. God would get the glory, and the politicians could sit their dumbfounded. Let's do it!

"... that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God..." (1 Peter 2:12, NIV)

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (Ephesians 2:10, NIV)

Posted by: Moose

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Useful Links (please feel free to post your own in the comments section):

How to Start a Pregnancy Care Center -- a checklist from the North American Mission Board

The House that Hope Built -- a story of how two women put together a ministry with God's help and guidance.

Please comment and share your own links and ideas of how Christians can get involved in the causes they hold dear.

Pastor's Appreciation Day Challenge

Tue, 23 Sep 2008 04:06:35 GMT

Did you know that today was national "thank you" day in the U.S.? Granted, it's only a two-year-old tradition created (or at least sponsored) by a chocolate company, but I've been thinking recently that my own lack of thankfulness really sours my attitude at times.

So what does this have to do with pastor's appreciation day? It really doesn't, but please bear with me and I will tie it all together!

Lately, I have been brooding because my pastor husband did not get what I thought was a well-deserved raise. Unlike the supposed "average pastor", he does not receive anything near $80,000 a year. That's certainly not our goal, but a few hundred more a month would have been easily affordable for our congregation, and would have gone a long way for us.

I had worked through a lot of my disappointment by Sunday, when our church showed a short video produced by the WMU (Women's Missionary Union) of Texas that erased the remnants of my foul mood. One statement made in the video brought me to tears and put it all into perspective. Apparently, many parents in the communities the WMU works with for the pure water, pure love project do not even name their children until they reach two years of age, because the death rate from preventable diseases is so high.

And what was I so upset about again? I've suddenly forgotten! Seeing that video broke my heart. Some day, I believe God will call me to work long term in situations like that, and the relatively simple life I live now will seem extravagant by comparison.

God has been working in my heart that I need to give more, even in times when I've been given less and may not feel like giving. In a time when the economy here seems uncertain, our missionaries and the people they serve need our help more than ever. The decreased value of the dollar, coupled with less giving to missions, is really putting a strain on our missionaries worldwide. Christian disaster relief organizations are feeling the pinch as well. People generally give less when they suddenly have less to give.

However, just like Jesus taught His disciples to love and show kindness to those who didn't love or show kindness to them; He has challenged me to love more, to serve more, and to give more when times are tougher, as a testimony of His love and faithfulness. And... I have been convicted that I need to be thankful more often, too; even when I'm disappointed and don't feel like thanking anyone.

So then, with October just a few weeks away (and all the pastor's appreciation activities that may or may not go along with it), I'd like to change things up a bit, and I'm hoping others will join me. During pastor's appreciation month, I am going to write letters of thanks and encouragement to the people in our congregation. My husband has been their pastor for many years; and during that time, we have been the recipients of many acts of kindness. Granted, some of these notes will be much easier to write than others; but with God's help, I am hoping to find something kind to say to each family. If I can't recall something specific to thank them for, I'm trusting that God will give me a word of encouragement for them instead. And just like Jesus even washed the feet of Judas, I'm going to write a loving message to the one who suggested last year that the church fire the pastor dude, even though he may still be trying to stir up trouble.

Jan, one of our fishbowl advisors, has a similar idea. "I was thinking that instead of sitting here wanting to be appreciated, that I would write notes to others in ministry whom I've appreciated... former pastors," she said. "And maybe send a card to the pastors in our association [of churches]. I bet many of them feel the same way," she added, acknowledging that it would be nice to be appreciated.

That's a great idea, Jan, and I may do that as well.

So... will you join us? Why sit around and wait for your congregation to show appreciation to you? As I blogged last year (Hmmm... I Don't Feel Very Appreciated), God appreciates you and so do many other Christians; and while it'd be nice if your church family did something nice in the coming month, you have the opportunity to bless others in the way you'd like to be blessed. You don't have to write the entire congregation or every pastor family you know -- maybe just the ones who have helped or encouraged you. Regardless of what you decide, let's bring a little Golden Rule living into this. Shall we?

I look forward to hearing comments about how blessing others was a blessing in your life.

Posted by: Moose

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When We Leave God Behind

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 20:23:23 GMT

There's nothing like a summertime cold to transport me into wintertime mode. I'm sure it seemed odd to others, however, to see me curled up on the couch last week -- sipping soup, drinking hot chocolate, and distracting my ailing thoughts with a good book. For me, it was survival, aided by the surprisingly good behavior of my younglings and the appreciated helpfulness of my husband (whom I often refer to as "the pastor dude" when I write online).

The book of the day was Me, Myself, & Bob: A True Story About Dreams, God, and Talking Vegetables. This autobiography by Phil Vischer had been on my "to read" list since before it was released. He writes about how his own dreams and personal ambitions led to the bankruptcy of Big Idea Productions, the company he founded to produce Veggie Tales and other Christian videos for children. As I was reading, it struck me that Phil got himself caught in the same trap that we as pastors' families can so easily rush right into -- the trap of getting so busy for God, that we actually leave Him behind.

Though nowhere in the ballpark of what Phil experienced, it reminded me of our recent struggle through a church building and relocation project. Over the last two or three years, I'd helplessly watched from the sidelines as my husband ran himself ragged. I doubt it was a coincidence that he added a new blood pressure medication to his daily regimen each year of our two-year project. I remember insisting to him that there's no way this stress could have been God's intention. After all, He's the inventor of the easy yoke and light burden concept.

I can think of other examples, too, when one of us saw a potential for a new ministry, and just went running ahead with it instead of patiently waiting on and partnering with God. "We need to have this in place," we'd think, "or we'll never reach out to families with young children." When I think of those times, I remember falling on our faces a lot!

What's funny is -- my husband and I have always insisted that ministry is a marathon, and we've generally been careful to pace ourselves rather than to sprint continuously. Yet, despite that strong resolve, it was so easy to slip into unhealthy patterns. What came easily in our 20s presented new challenges in our 30s, as our circumstances drastically changed.

Looking into the Bible, we can find many companions who succumbed to the same temptation. Abraham and Sarah instantly come to mind, but if you want to read about someone who literally did leave GOD behind, you can look at Mary and Joseph's situation at the end of Luke chapter two.

The pastor dude preached on that topic recently, and he made some interesting observations. He pointed out how Mary and Joseph just supposed Jesus was with them as they set out. (How often do we assume that?) Since they'd traveled a day's journey before seeking His presence, they were separated in the sense that they could no longer communicate with Him. Finding Jesus again involved a return to where they'd left Him.

For us, this involved getting alone with God this summer at a pastor's retreat hosted by Broomtree Ministries. During that week, I relearned how to be still and rediscovered the joy of knowing God. Since we've returned home, I have found a new ability to be patient and wait on God to direct my steps. Before the retreat, He had shown me a new direction for my personal ministry, and had given me tons of ideas for meeting this need we've identified. I almost plunged ahead then, but decided to wait until after the retreat. I'm so glad I waited! Now, I'm just thinking on them, writing them down in a journal, and waiting until it's time to work on them together.

For Phil Vischer, the death of his "big idea" turned out to be something beautiful -- "a divine mercy killing" as he called it. Now, he's launched a new work and is determined to do it God's way. JellyTelly, a Christian media network for children, will be coming soon to an internet near you. I look forward to hearing more from Phil on how he's approached the JellyTelly project differently; but for now, I just wish him well and look forward to seeing what He and God are going to accomplish together. Though technically not a pastor, I think we can all learn something from what God has shown Phil. It's time to be God's friend and to partner with Him, rather than busying ourselves on what we think He'd want us to do.

Posted by: Moose

Pastorswives.org maintains an online resource directory of retreats for pastors and wives:
http://www.pastorswives.org/resource_directory/pastors_wives_family_retreats

If you know of a resource that's not listed, please leave us a comment and we'll review it for possible inclusion in our directory.

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Shining Like Moses in the Midst of Turmoil

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 00:34:16 GMT

Well it finally happened to me. That thought, that possibility that's hidden somewhere in the back of probably every pastor couple's mind. I was trusting in God, yet still my heart was pounding, my pulse was throbbing, and my thoughts were racing. Why? Because it was my turn to experience a situation it seems almost everyone in the ministry experiences sooner or later: "Are we being fired!?!?!"

At first, the thoughts centered on "Who?" and "Why?" and "Who else believes this about us?" Then, I reminded myself that God is watching over us, which helped for a minute. Yet all too soon, the next round of questions bombarded my thoughts: "What about my children?" "How will this effect them?"

It takes more than a platitude of "God is watching over us" to calm my nerves, and here's why:

Losing a job is tough on anyone, but few people understand the increased turmoil a forced termination causes a minister's family. While those in other vocations can usually get a new job without moving, the pastor's family often ends up in much greater upheaval. Living in a parsonage? Automatically they must move. Staying in the ministry? Usually the next position is in a different town. Children in school? That makes it even tougher.

My oldest son is mildly autistic, and so we have endeavored to stay in the same school district since his diagnosis. The students in his class know him, love him, and look out for him. A new school district brings in the unknown, and the very real concern of bullying he'd most likely face among strangers. My youngest son has already chosen his wife. Seriously! And though I'm sure he'll outgrow his infatuation, I pondered all the relationships he'd developed over the years that would suddenly be yanked away from him.

But fortunately, God offers me much more than platitudes. As my thoughts settled once again, I was reminded of my study in the book of Exodus last fall. As I'd read about Moses leading the Israelites out of Egypt, God really impressed upon me to look beyond the narrative and into the relationship He and Moses must have had. So as I studied, I couldn't help but notice how Moses communed with God. Then right there in chapters 33-34, it hit me. The passage speaks of how God revealed His glory to Moses, passing in front of Him and speaking of His nature. I'd studied it many times before, but had never noticed when God revealed His glory.

I think it's significant that right after the people rebelled against Moses' (and ultimately God's) leadership, God revealed Himself to Moses in an even more personal and intimate way than He had ever done so before. And afterwards, Moses' face shone -- so much that he had to wear a veil in between meetings with God. And I tend to believe His relationship with God was tight from then on -- his face continued to shine as He continued to meet with God.

Fortunately for us, our termination scare was short-lived. Although it still stings to think how one of our staunchest supporters turned into someone who was speaking of "moving us on down the road;" God still has a plan for us in our current church, and we rejoice in that. However, if/when this ever does happen, I know that I can crawl into the lap of the One who cares for me the most, just the way I did when it seemed like the worst was happening. And His peace really does pass all understanding.

If you're going through a termination experience or have recently experienced a forced resignation, I won't insult you by saying I know how you feel. I only know from the experiences some of my pastor's wife friends have had, that it stinks terribly, more than I can imagine. At the same time, I do know that you can draw closer to God than you ever have before; and like Moses, you will see Him in a whole new light -- as one who is loving, faithful, and an ever present help in times of trouble.

Posted by: Moose

Pastorswives.org maintains a resource directory for those undergoing a forced termination:
http://www.pastorswives.org/resource_directory/forced_terminations

If you know of a resource that's not listed, please leave us a comment and we'll review it for possible inclusion in our directory. Also, if you would like to share how God helped you through a forced termination experience, please feel free to write a comment or leave a link to a specific blog entry where you've written about it.

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Whatcha' Cooking For Easter?

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 21:55:36 GMT

Update: This didn't work out so well. It was too much of a last-minute idea. We'll have to try this again in the future, but I'll give more warning next time.

I'm going to give this blog carnival, meme, or whatever you want to call it a try. I'd like to hear from other pastors' wives on what their family cooks for Easter. If you'd like to participate, here's all you have to do:

1. write about it this week at your own site, (this will work for any blogging platform, so not limited to Xanga)

2. include a link to this post in your entry,
( http://weblog.xanga.com/PastorsWivesThriving/647406137/whatcha-cooking-for-easter.html )

3. and then come back here to add a direct link to your post (rather than just a general link to your blog) with the green Mister Linky graphic down below. You may need to leave a comment on your own blog in order to access the direct link feature.

4. if you'd like to tag your post, I'd suggest pastors' wives blogging or pws blogging, as I hope to do more of these in the future.

Also, if you have a tip on how to make cooking for the Easter Holiday easier, please write about that, too. Deadline for inclusion in this post is Monday March 24, 2008. That'll hopefully give everyone time to read the ideas if they need last-minute inspiration.

For more tips and ideas, be sure to check out what our members do for Thanksgiving and Christmas to make a nice meal as simple as possible:

http://www.pastorswives.org/real_ministers_wives/holiday_meals

I look forward to reading your posts!

- Moose

Message Board Update -- Looking for Affiliates

Sat, 15 Mar 2008 22:58:46 GMT

This isn't the promised post I've been working on, but wanted to let everyone know about an important website update.

We try our best to add useful content to our website at pastorswives.org for the pastor's wife who may be searching the web for help. But hands down, the most popular feature of our website has always been the message board. Sue (our webmaster) and I have chatted before about how we pay for web hosting and then use a free, ad-supported website for the pastors' wives message board, when the message board seems to be the main focus of our ministry. Over the years we've tossed ideas around, and here's where we are now:

We've always encouraged our members to remember that we do not necessarily endorse the ads that run across the top of our message boards. I've had concerns in the past, myself. However, last Saturday I saw an ad that truly horrified me. I'm sure it was a mistake, but it was the proverbial straw in my book. So... I immediately paid for ad-free and contacted Sue. She was thankful I was able to handle it and we've decided to split the cost of ad-free this month.

There was a time when I wanted to leave the service we use and set up our own forums; but with new features constantly being added, the knowledge that we couldn't take our database of valuable posts with us, and the idea of letting someone else handle the security worries; it's seeming more likely we might stay put and just pay to stay ad-free, at least for now. The problem is that ad-free has become quite expensive lately because our forums have grown in membership and activity. With an average of 200,000 page clicks per month, we could end up paying $28-$35/month just for the message board. To off-set this cost, we're exploring affiliate opportunities that will not harm our non-profit ministry status.

As much as we'd love to be completely ad-free, it just doesn't seem possible at this point. However, at least this way, the ads that will be on our site will be ones that are non-offensive and actually useful to our members. So, that's where we are right now. I already have a short list of possibilities, but if anyone has any ideas or advice, please feel free to comment or send us a message.

Posted by: Moose

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New Look

Thu, 28 Feb 2008 19:31:00 GMT

I have a new post in the works, but until then, a short note:

Exqsme originally had the idea for this blog, and set it up back in mid-April, 2007. I think she did a fantastic job of designing it, but I changed the theme last night to make it integrate with the rest of our redesigned website at pastorswives.org. Here is the old theme for reminiscing/admiration sake:

and... I did save the theme in case we change our mind!

UPDATE: as of 08-08-08 I have changed my mind and reverted, but will try to blend it with the new site the best I can over time.

Posted by: Moose

"Hmmm... I Don't Feel Very Appreciated"

Mon, 22 Oct 2007 03:39:20 GMT

If you're a fan of the videos from Big Idea, you could probably hear Mr. Nezzer's voice when you read the title of this post, as he expresses his disappointment at the lack of thanks for his "lovely gift of chocolate" (Veggie Tales' Rack, Shack & Benny). True, there are times when pastors and wives can feel overworked, under-paid, and, like fictional Mr. Nezzar, under-appreciated. Especially now, as October winds down and pastor's appreciation month comes to an end, pastors' families around the country may be feeling either special or slighted, depending on what their congregations did or didn't do and say.

I have met some pastors' wives whose churches really go all out in honoring them. Others receive some acknowledgement, while still others receive none at all. I've even met a pastor's wife or two who have served in a church where only the senior pastor was honored, as if his service to the church were the only one that was important or valued. They, as children's and/or youth pastors' wives, were even asked to contribute to the senior pastor's gift. If you've ever been in that situation, or even if you have not, this blog entry is for you.

I conducted a little research and found out that pastors' appreciation month was first established in 1992. I'm not sure by whom, but I do know that Focus on the Family was instrumental in promoting it to churches in the mid-to late 90s. It's become more well-known and publicized in recent years, and companies like Hallmark have even joined the likes of Dayspring in making clergy appreciation cards now. With the knowledge of the day, comes a little bit of expectation. It's a bit like knowing your birthday is approaching and hoping someone will say, "Happy Birthday" or send you a card.

If no one has said how much they appreciate your service to the Lord, or even if they have, let me say it to you and to all the pastors and pastors' wives who read this -- I appreciate you. We're in this together and you are a valuable member of God's team. I know how you, pastor and wife, pour of yourselves into your congregation. I know how you love them and/or strive to love when some may seem annoying, exasperating, or otherwise difficult to love. I know how you pray for them in secret and how you do things at church that many may take for granted.

I know how you, pastor's wife, sometimes may struggle to get the family out the door by yourself on Sunday morning because your husband has to be there early. I know how you felt when a church member you considered a friend gave you the cold shoulder because they were upset with your husband. I know how you've sat on pins and needles, wishing you could be a fly on the wall, while your beloved was in a tough meeting that went long.

I also know the joy you've felt as you've seen the fruit of your efforts. I've felt the amazement you've felt as you've seen God work in situations you'd deemed hopeless. I know the discomfort you felt when someone came to you for advice simply because you are the pastor's wife, and the elation you felt when God helped you guide them in His wisdom. And I know the honor and humility you've felt as you've been presented opportunities to serve that are unique to your gifts, personality, and experience. But more importantly than that--God knows, and He's cheering you on.

"For God is not unjust so as to forget your work and the love which you have shown toward His name, in having ministered and in still ministering to the saints." (Hebrews 6:10, NASB95)

Others appreciate you, too. There are Christians all over the United States and Canada who honor pastors by providing retreat and vacation facilities for pastors, wives, (and sometimes families) at little to no cost. They know your sacrifice, and they are there for you. I have personally stayed at the Cedarly retreat with my husband, and the house was a mansion. It is a beautiful place to refresh and renew, and there really was no catch. They didn't use the evening meal to pull out the multi-level marketing plan or the time-share condo opportunity. They simply wanted to encourage us.

While it is certainly neat to be honored and/or encouraged by your congregation and other Christians, I think it's even "neater" how much God values your service to Him. Did you know that there's a special crown of honor for pastors? Peter calls it the "unfading crown of glory"; or as the New Century Version words it, "a glorious crown that will never lose its beauty". (1 Peter 5:1-4)

So if pastor's appreciation day came and went without anyone noticing, and if pastor's appreciation month has been a bit disappointing, please know that God sees what you do. He sees the love, prayers, and hard work you pour into His sheep; and He says, "well done, my good and faithful servant." In the end, that's what matters the most.

"...because you know that your work in the Lord is never wasted." (1 Corinthians 15:58b, NCV)

Posted by: Moose

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