Did you know that today was
national "thank you" day in the U.S.? Granted, it's only a two-year-old tradition created (or at least sponsored) by a chocolate company, but I've been thinking recently that my own lack of thankfulness really sours my attitude at times.
So what does this have to do with pastor's appreciation day? It really
doesn't, but please bear with me and I will tie it all together!
Lately, I have been brooding because my pastor husband did not get what I thought was a well-deserved raise. Unlike the supposed "average pastor", he does not receive anything near $80,000 a year. That's certainly not our goal, but a few hundred more a month would have been easily affordable for our congregation, and would have gone a long way for us.
I had worked through a lot of my disappointment by Sunday, when our church showed a short video produced by the WMU (Women's Missionary Union) of Texas that erased the remnants of my foul mood. One statement made in the video brought me to tears and put it all into perspective. Apparently, many parents in the communities the WMU works with for the
pure water, pure love project do not even name their children until they reach two years of age, because the death rate from preventable diseases is so high.
And what was I so upset about again? I've suddenly forgotten! Seeing that video broke my heart. Some day, I believe God will call me to work long term in situations like that, and the relatively simple life I live now will seem extravagant by comparison.
God has been working in my heart that I need to give more, even in times when I've been given less and may not feel like giving. In a time when the economy here seems uncertain, our missionaries and the people they serve need our help more than ever. The decreased value of the dollar, coupled with less giving to missions, is really putting a strain on our missionaries worldwide. Christian disaster relief organizations are feeling the pinch as well. People generally give less when they suddenly have less to give.
However, just like Jesus taught His disciples to love and show kindness to those who didn't love or show kindness to them; He has challenged me to love more, to serve more, and to give more when times are tougher, as a testimony of His love and faithfulness. And... I have been convicted that I need to be thankful more often, too; even when I'm disappointed and don't feel like thanking anyone.
So then, with October just a few weeks away (and all the
pastor's appreciation activities that may or may not go along with it), I'd like to change things up a bit, and I'm hoping others will join me. During pastor's appreciation month, I am going to write letters of thanks and encouragement to the people in our congregation. My husband has been their pastor for many years; and during that time, we have been the recipients of many acts of kindness. Granted, some of these notes will be much easier to write than others; but with God's help, I am hoping to find something kind to say to each family. If I can't recall something specific to thank them for, I'm trusting that God will give me a word of encouragement for them instead. And just like Jesus even washed the feet of Judas, I'm going to write a loving message to the one who suggested last year that the church fire the pastor dude, even though he may still be trying to stir up trouble.
Jan, one of our fishbowl advisors, has a similar idea. "I was thinking that instead of sitting here wanting to
be appreciated, that I would write notes to others in ministry whom I've
appreciated... former pastors," she said. "And maybe send a card to the pastors in
our association [of churches]. I bet many of them feel the same way," she added, acknowledging that it would be nice to be appreciated.
That's a great idea, Jan, and I may do that as well.
So... will you join us? Why sit around and wait for your congregation to show appreciation to you? As I blogged last year (
Hmmm... I Don't Feel Very Appreciated), God appreciates you and so do many other Christians; and while it'd be nice if your church family did something nice in the coming month, you have the opportunity to bless others in the way you'd like to be blessed. You don't have to write the entire congregation or every pastor family you know -- maybe just the ones who have helped or encouraged you. Regardless of what you decide, let's bring a little Golden Rule living into this. Shall we?
I look forward to hearing comments about how blessing others was a blessing in your life.
Posted by: Moose
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Comments (5)
I read your post just in time! Funny how God does that. Our church is struggling financially. As a pastor's wife, that works full time and a second job with 3 kids at home...and my husband is gone 2-3 times a week...it's easy for me to get frustrated with church and church activities. My husband is the associate pastor and we're not always privy to financial status of the church. Today I found some paperwork indicating a suggestion to decrease his pay by $100/wk. Reading your post, reminded me to keep things in perspective...that God has always provided, and to give out of my need. I feel really selfish when I read about people as you've described, or less fortunate.
I like the idea of sending out letters to the congregation, too. Funny, I used to do that. Again, I think it's easy to get disgruntled. How do you suggest avoiding that pity-pit? HELP!!
Thank you for the comment! re: How do I suggest avoiding the pity-pit...
Well, first off, you have to know that I by no means have it all together! I fall into that pit myself, as probably we all do. I think the key to making the pit experience short-lived is to recognize early on what's happening with our emotions, and to ask God for help in sorting through them.
I jokingly tell the older children I teach in Sunday School, that if they don't know the answer to a question I ask them, a few safe guesses are, "God, Jesus, read the Bible, and pray." It's a bit of comic relief in our class, but at the same time, there's a lot of truth there. When we're in a pit of despair, we're often looking to ourselves and cutting God's answers out of our lives.
My first temptation when we didn't get our expected raise was to go over the budget with a fine-toothed comb, and to become stingy with our giving. Instead, God led me to gather up all the coins in our household (with a joyful, obedient heart even), and have the children help me fill up our little collection bowls for world hunger. It certainly went against my natural inclination, but it worked wonders for my soul! I still may go over our budget with a fine-toothed comb, but I have promised myself to be stingy on self-comforts and generous in giving.
And then there's perspective! I have yet to be beaten, tortured, or put in prison. If Paul could call such things "light and momentary troubles", then my problems must look like a little temper tantrum from a child who didn't get her way. Even so, I know God cares when I'm feeling that way, and He wants me to bring my burdens to Him.
"casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7 (NKJV)
By the way... I don't know your situation, but it wouldn't hurt to share your financial needs with the congregation or at least the budget committee. One year I put together a spread sheet of our income and how we spent it, and it really made an impact when my pastor husband showed it to the budget committee. They could clearly see that we weren't just throwing money down the toilet in a wasteful manner; and they could probably compare it with how they were spending their own money.
Really like this idea and i'll be joining you. How awesome to sit back and pour on the love rather then looking and thinking no one loves me. I always take care of my pastor/hubby so I know he will be blessed no matter what, but honestly i didn't join my hubby in this call to ministry to be appriciated.. I joined with him to get involved and love the church the way Jesus loved them. Thank you for posting this!
I am so glad I read this today
Thank you!