There's nothing like a summertime cold to transport me into wintertime mode. I'm sure it seemed odd to others, however, to see me curled up on the couch last week -- sipping soup, drinking hot chocolate, and distracting my ailing thoughts with a good book. For me, it was survival, aided by the surprisingly good behavior of my younglings and the appreciated helpfulness of my husband (whom I often refer to as "the pastor dude" when I write online).
The book of the day was
Me, Myself, & Bob: A True Story About Dreams, God, and Talking Vegetables. This autobiography by
Phil Vischer had been on my "to read" list since before it was released. He writes about how his own dreams and personal ambitions led to the bankruptcy of Big Idea Productions, the company he founded to produce Veggie Tales and other Christian videos for children. As I was reading, it struck me that Phil got himself caught in the same trap that we as pastors' families can so easily rush right into -- the trap of getting so busy for God, that we actually leave Him behind.
Though nowhere in the ballpark of what Phil experienced, it reminded me of our recent struggle through a church building and relocation project. Over the last two or three years, I'd helplessly watched from the sidelines as my husband ran himself ragged. I doubt it was a coincidence that he added a new blood pressure medication to his daily regimen each year of our two-year project. I remember insisting to him that there's no way this stress could have been God's intention. After all, He's the inventor of the easy yoke and light burden concept.
I can think of other examples, too, when one of us saw a potential for a new ministry, and just went running ahead with it instead of patiently waiting on and partnering with God. "We need to have this in place," we'd think, "or we'll never reach out to families with young children." When I think of those times, I remember falling on our faces a lot!
What's funny is -- my husband and I have always insisted that ministry is a marathon, and we've generally been careful to pace ourselves rather than to sprint continuously. Yet, despite that strong resolve, it was so easy to slip into unhealthy patterns. What came easily in our 20s presented new challenges in our 30s, as our circumstances drastically changed.
Looking into the Bible, we can find many companions who succumbed to the same temptation. Abraham and Sarah instantly come to mind, but if you want to read about someone who literally did leave GOD behind, you can look at Mary and Joseph's situation at the end of Luke chapter two.
The pastor dude preached on that topic recently, and he made some interesting observations. He pointed out how Mary and Joseph just supposed Jesus was with them as they set out. (How often do we assume that?) Since they'd traveled a day's journey before seeking His presence, they were separated in the sense that they could no longer communicate with Him. Finding Jesus again involved a return to where they'd left Him.
For us, this involved getting alone with God this summer at a pastor's retreat hosted by
Broomtree Ministries. During that week, I relearned how to be still and rediscovered the joy of knowing God. Since we've returned home, I have found a new ability to be patient and wait on God to direct my steps. Before the retreat, He had shown me a new direction for my personal ministry, and had given me tons of ideas for meeting this need we've identified. I almost plunged ahead then, but decided to wait until after the retreat. I'm so glad I waited! Now, I'm just thinking on them, writing them down in a journal, and waiting until it's time to work on them together.
For
Phil Vischer, the death of his "big idea" turned out to be something beautiful -- "a divine mercy killing" as he called it. Now, he's launched a new work and is determined to do it God's way.
JellyTelly, a Christian media network for children, will be coming soon to an internet near you. I look forward to hearing more from Phil on how he's approached the
JellyTelly project differently; but for now, I just wish him well and look forward to seeing what He and God are going to accomplish together. Though technically not a pastor, I think we can all learn something from what God has shown Phil. It's time to be God's friend and to partner with Him, rather than busying ourselves on what we think He'd want us to do.
Posted by: Moose
Pastorswives.org maintains an online resource directory of retreats for pastors and wives:
http://www.pastorswives.org/resource_directory/pastors_wives_family_retreats
If
you know of a resource that's not listed, please leave us a comment and
we'll review it for possible inclusion in our directory.
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Comments (2)
THAT was fantabulous... and I absolutly love this poin : " He pointed out how Mary and Joseph just supposed Jesus was with them as they set out. (How often do we assume that?)"
Thank you so much for writing this!
It is so easy to leave God behind in our zeal for ministry. Thanks for the great example of what Phil has learned and also from your own life. That is definitely something I struggle with on a weekly basis!